Of Political Liars And Crooks: Dr. Joice Banda Luckiest


President Joyce Banda

President Joyce Banda

Dr Joyce Banda is probably one luckiest female president in the whole world. Only a few months ago, she was flown to Europe on a fully funded trip to give a key note address to the Europeans on her success story in Malawi after implementing the IMF policies and this trip came on the heels of yet another good will trip from Goodluck Jonathan of Nigeria who thought it wise to send his air force one to fly our lady president all the way to Nigeria where they discussed bilateral relationship. Nigerians are known to be registered crooks the world over and I am not sure what the two were discussing in Nigeria and why Goodluck was very generous to our lady president to the point of flying her in his air force one.Now  we hear Goodluck Jonathan advised amayi to sell ESCOM and Water Boards and immediately open a diplomatic office in Lagos. I feel Goodluck will be better off worrying about Boko Horama other than Malawi. Yes, we appreciate the prophecy of deaths from his country but spare us on this one my friend Good.Well? Did I mention yet another trip that took her to Korea where among other things she was decorated as a doctor in economic matters. Lucky you mum. Ndinu odala mwa akazi onse. Mutiwoneife ana anu ovutika a Malawi.Mutimvere chifundo ife ana anu.Mudzina la dziko la Malawi amen.

And now, our lady president has also been given another goodwill gesture where she has been flown to another unknown destination in Africa where she intends to mix and mingle with other great minds of the world. Do not forget that she has been selected as one of the powerful women in the world and I guess very soon Malawi might be a member of NATO at the rate we are going. Joice Banda is not only powerful but courageous because other leaders would have immediately cancelled the trip given the situation prevailing in Malawi at the time she left. There was a crisis here that needed her attention and this president is surely made of steel. I guess she might have consulted the wise men from Nigeria who assured that everything would be OK and there was no need to worry. Remember, she is God fearing and consults widely men of God.

But when Dr. Joyce Banda was leaving, things were not all that good in Malawi and I am sure if the trip was  pleasing to her though she attempted to wear a brave face as she gave that interview to journalists. I feel that she did not even have the appetite to enjoy those good plane meals because she must have been agonizing if ever she would find the same Malawi that she left because school kids were all over irked by their unlearning due to the industrial action by their teachers. I hear she suffers from high blood pressure and it is at this particular moment that her pressure must have been reading scaring figures. The message was loud and clear that the centre would not hold and the only option for her was just to give in to the civil servants demands. The involvement of school kids fast tracked the whole process because we all know that kids act like robots and once they are told to do things, they do as instructed. If you tell a kid to pronounce A he will say A not U. with the speed at which things have been done when kids took to the streets, most people feel that this will be a new strategy to force government to start listening. These kids were fighting  for us parents because they can appreciate the trouble we have to feed them and send them to school.  Some of them had the last bite of bread in April 2012. Some of us are still struggling to pay back MK450. That we borrowed to pay for school fund and our kids saw this pain in us and thought it was time to act on our behalf. I say thank you to all school kids of Malawi.

Now the message has been sent and now the arrogant government has listened to the cries of the people though there is still more to be done. At least there is some starting point and it is my humble appeal to the authorities to try to be proactive in some of the demands that have been presented more especially the harmonization of positions. Those of the servants that have seen more years of class room should be rewarded for their efforts accordingly and the reward should be equal if the package is coming from treasury. There is no way government parastals that does not make any profit but rely on government subventions to be paying their employees different salaries from those of the main stream civil service. And the tendency of outsourcing people from the private sector to head government departments or ministries should be put to a stop because this only manages to demotivate people who work hard and are patriotic to the civil service. We do not want to once again tell our kids that some of us have degrees and yet a messenger at RBM is paid five times as much who has a JCE . We need to be rewarded accordingly so that our kids should see the importance of education and the same grading should go to members of parliament. There should be salary scales commensurate to their qualification just to incarnate the spirit of education in people.


Dr LipengaI abhore people like Ken Lipenga and Moses Kunkuyu who wanted to give an impression that things as demanded by the civil servants were not feasible. Ken Lipenga who has now worn the tag of chief lier made yet another lie to the effect that the wage bill which currently stands at MK92b will balloon to MK276b if the 67% increament was supposed to be made. He attempted to scare us that if the increament was made as demanded, then all other services in the civil service will stop to function and this only showed his deficiency in matters of government. Before making such scaring statements, he should have widely consulted with technocrats at treasury to teach him on how to play around with government figures.

Memories are still fresh on how Ken Lipenga lied to the whole nation and he has chosen to perpetuate his lies and I am not sure why Dr. Joice Banda still wants to maintain this professional lier at the ministry of finance. I don’t take lightly the error of commission where he said the wage bill will shoot to MK276b if we were to effect 67% salary increament because I have in mind the issue of ghost workers in the civil service and I am afraid that Ken Lipenga might have factored in figures to pay off to ghost workers, hence his deliberate move to twist figures and give wrong information.This time around Ken will not sacrifice the head of treasury or the MRA boss because this was purely his own creation. It is time now that our MP should demand for his  removal. Yes we know and understand that to lie is a virtue in Malawians politics but at the rate at which Ken is perfecting the art of telling lies, it is very scaring that even Lucifer might appoint him as his archangel.

Now there is this man called Moses Kunkuyu who appears to still be in celebrative mood because he still does not believe that he was appointed minister of Information but he chooses to misinform the nation. He has made pronouncements in the recent past which leaves some of us doubting even the appointing authority why she keeps such misfits in her cabinet.Moses started as a humble man saying the right things but over time he has acquired  human arrogance syndrome and chooses  to misinform the nation every time he finds chance.

When Malawians are complaining on any issues, he goes to the archieves to search for past records and uses the same to justify mistakes by the current administration. What Moses forgets is that such comparison makes the administration of Joice Banda to look stupid and clueless. We elected people with sober minds to run our government because we do not want them to repeat mistakes of their predecessors.

Malawians have complained about the president making too many useless trips which are only draining government money. Malawians complained that the change of the potriat will cost money but Moses seems not to find any fault in these complaints and uses his valued times to dig into records inorder to justify such extravagance and waste. We are in austerity period and some of these ministers need to take some private lessons to learn what austerity means and they will stop justify such unnecessary expenditure that are done only for political espendiency.

When Mbelwa died, the president declared that he will be accorded a state funeral, Moses was all over town applauding such pronouncements because he does not know what it costs to have such funeral. Mbelwa was a traditionalist and it was prudent upon government just to leave ngoni tradional prevail over the burial and leave our soldiers to be strategizing on how to defend our lake from the Tanzanians.  For sure I saw no reason why the state involved itself in this purely  traditional activity and some of us would have loved if the Ngoni’s had rejected this British style of burial because it was the British that we fought to gain our independence and it is ironic for us to mix their culture with us. By the way was their any pillow for the dead chief. History has it that the ngonis used to slaughter one human being to act as a pillow for the dead chief or else this is one of the cultural practices that are being discarded just like Kupimbira? With these remarks, the president should be advised to cancel her decree that all TA or chiefs will be accorded state funerals.This is both expensive, uncultural and untraditional and dilutes the whole purpose of preserving our traditional customs.

When civil servants wanted a pay increase to absolve the shocks of the devaluation, Moses wanted us to believe that it was not attainable and that over 70,000 workers will have to be retrenched for increase to be effected. I guess the 70,000 would not include his relatives and those of the ruling elite that have found jobs in the civil service through the back door.

Most of us have been wondering why president always goofs, it is people like Moses Kunkuyu and Ken Lipenga who give the president wrong advise and I feel it is about time the president showed them the exit door if Dr. Banda wants to serve Malawians well.

The same Moses is telling us that there is forex in our banks and this makes me angry when I have failed to remit examination fees for my son. Where is the forex minister of misinformation. Please tell amayi the truth that there is no forex in our banks but if she has chance to get forex on her trips , then she is just drawing from accounts reserved for a few previlaged Malawians like herself. I believe if our president can be told the right things like what our Dr told her, she will make a good president but people like Moses survive on telling the president lies. My advise to the presedent is that the police should not be given the increament because they were busy gassing us when we were fighting for the increament.


JB foundationMemories are still fresh on how Ralph Kasambara defended the appointment of Khumbo Kachali as overseer at the EC. When the whole nation saw that this was an anomaly, he saw no fault in that decision. The other issue was the doubling of the office of AG and Minister of Justice. When ever body saw that this was an anomaly, Ralph defended the same and we saw how he made out of court awards including those of himself. There are many old cases waiting at the AGs office but Ralph went ahead to deal with those he had interest in without looking at the policy of first in first out. Malawians are saying that Dr Joice Banda should declare  assets but Moses Kunkuyu and Ralph Kasambara are seeing no sense in such demands. We all know Joice Banda and how she used to struggle prior to her presidency to the point of borrowing money from akatapila to bail herself out of economic situation and sadly she has become a donor who has maize to give every body when she even does not have a garden and she says she is given the maize by her friends who are even refusing to be named. Come on guys, give the president good advise that will help her serve Malawians better as she swore. We know  that as president she enjoys various gifts from different people and she has surely graduated from the class of negative millionaires to those of Billionares.ACB should not pretend as if they are seeing nothing wrong with these generous gifts that started flowing to her soon after becoming president. People like Merinda Gates would not waste  time with somebody whose account shows small figures and I hope Merida was guided by Forbes to see where she could find  her fellow world rich women and Malawi happened to be the place. Joice Banda school that had school buses that would break down every few kilometers has sadly become the etton of Africa with kids being delivered in orange British style school buses. Search me. I hear my fellow basket ball friend Roy has entrusted over 100 freightliner with GPY. Susan Banda will be heading the Mellenium Challenge account, Oponya is having good time at the ministry of education for a job she never applied and many others who have seen mannas falling from heaven. I envy you guys

2 Responses to "Of Political Liars And Crooks: Dr. Joice Banda Luckiest"

  1. justina banda  March 3, 2013 at 2:55 pm

    Stupid Government

  2. Five Moba  March 3, 2013 at 8:26 am

    Wawooooo!!!! I salute you, that is true story, I dont know what we must do so that fucken Joyce Banda must hear this, stupid uneducated care taker, just wait all those things will be taken back to government next year, come 2014 adzakodza magazi, fucken bitch. For you kunkuyu and Kasambala you will see chidameta khanga mpala


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